Articles

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  • Up

    Up   By John T. Schwiebert, MDivjohn@tearsoup.com      “Up,” the 2009 animated film from Walt Disney/Pixar studios, can be appreciated for many reasons, one being its portrayal of the realities of human grief.  I recommend it, especially for those who have lost a family member to death. As the movie opens we meet Carl Fredricksen, an adventurous boy who quickly becomes fast friends with Ellie, a young girl who shares his adventurous spirit.  Childhood sweethearts, they eventually marry.  Their dreams...

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  • Tough Mothers

    Tough Mothers   By John T. Schwiebert, ThMjohn@tearsoup.com     “ . . . and a sword will pierce your own soul also”  --Luke 2:35 In Luke’s story of Jesus, the above words are spoken by a wise old man named Simeon to Mary, as he holds the infant Jesus—Mary’s first-born child—in his arms.  Luke seems to be offering a clue that Mary will one day suffer deep grief because of the violent death of her offspring. The piercing of a...

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  • To Be Known

    To Be Known   By Pat Schwiebert, R.N.pat@tearsoup.com     Art was a quiet man.  I knew him for 25 years.  He never had much to say.  He always sat in the same pew at church and had the best attendance on record.  He always sang the loudest.  He never drew attention to himself (except for maybe when he sang), and he never needed to be the center of attention.  He knew our names and he always seemed glad to...

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  • They Knew Them Already

    They Knew Them Already    By Pat Schwiebert, R.N.pat@tearsoup.com   They were young and innocent.  That was then.  This is now.  In a blink of an eye, a solitary moment, their lives were changed.  Their baby died.  Their baby was wanted, loved, and now missed.  From a young age they had been told life is unfair.  Talking about it is an intellectual experience.  Now they have to live it. Back in the 70’s when we medical professionals were being urged...

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  • The Perfect Heart

    The Perfect Heart   Author Unknown    One day a young man was standing in the middle of the town proclaimingthat he had the most beautiful heart in the whole valley. A large crowdgathered and they all admired his heart for it was perfect. There wasnot a mark or a flaw in it. Yes, they all agreed it truly was the mostbeautiful heart they had ever seen. The young man was very proud andboasted more loudly about his beautiful heart.Suddenly,...

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  • The Others

    The Others   By Thom Hogan   A teardrop fell in the forest today.Where it fell the parents know the way. The pain of grief to the mothers,Is a pain that is unknown to the others. And a father’s grief,To the others is brief. Sadness is no good the others will say.Move on, let go, tomorrow is another day. Life is too short to linger in pain.But our lives will stop again and again. A teardrop fell in the forest...

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  • The Other Side of Loss

    The Other Side Loss   By John T. Schwiebert, ThMjohn@tearsoup.com      Dare we speak of any personal loss that we experience as also having a positive aspect?  I almost don’t want to ask this question because I am fully aware how hurtful it can be when friends try to comfort those who are grieving by diminishing the severity of their loss. How often the grieving person has heard words like these, after the death of a loved one. “She’s in...

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  • The Loss of My Child

    The Loss of My Child   By Bernd Coxwegerbc1_@hotmail.com     My loss occurred on December 9th, 2001. My wife was 22 weeks and a couple days into her pregnancy. We were both starting to get excited. Doing the usual things, that most pregnant couples do.  We had to go a different route. We had to go to a Fertilization Doctor. It’s ok. They understand the grief and hardship that women go through, or that couples go through. It’s hard...

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  • The Holidays, How We Survived

    The Holidays, How We Survived     By Bart SumnerHealing-improv.org               We all know that the holidays create stress and expectations that can often make the family visits and busy schedules seem more painful than festive, but after the death of a close family member, the holidays become more of a challenge than ever. In our case, losing our 10 year-old son David in the beginning of October 2009 poised a particularly difficult task. Halloween was coming, followed quickly by...

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  • The Dragonfly Story

    The Dragonfly Story   By Walter Dudley Cavert    “In the bottom of an old pond lived some grubs who could not understand why none of their group ever came back after crawling up the lily stems to the top of the water.  They promised each other that the next one who was called to make the upward climb would return and tell what had happened to him.  Soon one of them felt an urgent impulse to seek the surface;...

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  • The Challenge of Grieving Openly

    The Challenge of Grieving Openly   By Pat Schwiebert, R.N.pat@tearsoup.com     “Never apologize for showing feelings.  Remember that when you do, you apologize for the truth.”    - Benjamin Disraeli   How hard it is in our culture to be able to openly grieve. We are a people who desire (or expect) good times, quick fixes, and moderation in all of our behaviors. We are easily embarrassed, impatient and judgmental when other people exhibit excessive displays of emotion. And we...

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  • The Book of Job - Part Two

    The Book of Job: A Three Thousand-Year-Old Story of Grief   By Rev John T. Schwiebert, MDivjohn@metanoiaumc.org   Part Two: Miserable Comforters     Fortunate is the bereaved person who has genuine friends—loyal companions whose steady, caring presence helps sustain them through prolonged periods of grief. Unfortunately such companions are rare.  And sometimes the pain of a personal loss is complicated by a further loss—the sudden or gradual fading of friendships when “friends,” for a variety of reasons, cannot deal with...

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